HAiLEY & MAU   

Did you ever experience for once in your life that you're all alone; you don't have any loved one to hug you or pat your back? You feel like you don't have any friend sitting beside you and offering a shoulder to cry on? And then there came a pair of stuff toy--"voo doo/rag doll" look alike made you feel at ease and made you smile and then all of a sudden you'll realize, those palm-sized thing saved your day. Did you? Well I did. :] Almost everyday during those dark days (so far) of my life.

Hailey and Mau (HALI-MAW) are my big nose, buttoned eye gray "voo doo/ rag doll" (actually I really dunno in what doll category they would fit). THay were given to me by my KONEK(my best-EST and the worst-EST friend I've ever met in my nineteen years of existence but it goes along without saying as what our argumant had ended =]). Hailey is a lot more dirtier tham Mau--because she's been with me eversince! She was given to me on the April fool's day and Mau was hers. That moment on, Hailey played a big role in my life. She became one of my stress relievers by talking to her. There are times that I feel sad but I need to pretend in front of others that there's nothing wrong with me. I have this "Ngiti na Lang Mechanism" to hide the emptiness that I feel. Hailey helped me. Before my konek left for abroad, she gave me Mau. And now I'm talking to both of them whenever I needed someone to talk to(crazy, huh?). Sadly, they haven't given any feedback up to now ha-ha! I miss my konek but I'd probably miss my palm-sized dolls in case I've lost them(kiddin'!).

Years from now, Hailey and Mau will live happily ever after... with ME. :)

The End

SORRY

Several years ago, I'm the master apologiser, or should I say "was"?

I apologized so often that it came to the point where my brother told me to stop saying sorry to everyone for everything over things that had nothing to do with me or weren't my fault. My response was: "Alam ko. Tama ka. I'm SORRY." I thought it was my job to keep things together and besides, women are more conscious to think there should be peace. BUT now, my point of view on this subject had changed. Apologies don't always equal peace especially when those apologies are insincere or unnecessary. I should not say sorry when I've done something wrong and it was my intention to do it.

I will-and never should apologize for:

• My opinion.
• Refusing to compromise my integrity
• Almost bumping into someone in a doorway. I should just say "Excuse me."(haha!)
• Being educated and behaving accordingly
• Needing time ALONE(because it's what keeps me sane!)
• Not tolerating bad behaviour
• If in the process of correcting your rude behaviour, I slightly insulted you. If you are acting on a considerate manner, I wouldn't have insulted you.
• Being right.
• Being ME.

--Sorry seems to be the easiest word but for me, I'd probably think twice when and where to use it. :)

Yours truly,

ME.

c r a z y thoughts xD

As many of my friends often point out(in quite complimentary tones, I might add), I'm known for being a little scattered in my thoughts. Whether or not I should share them in this blog site because of my subject but, hey, let's celebrate the freedom that we have. :)


There have been many strange things rattling around in my head recently- probably in that large cavity that exists between my SMALL brain and my SKULL. :)) I can use this blog to create something that would lead to my definition of "pointless", but read on if you dare. :] /harhar/

Why do giraffes have long necks?? Why do gays love guys?? Why do most guys hate gays?? Why am I asking this non sense questions?? Why??? :O But I think, with all of nature's madness, there is a wonderful functionality to all of it. I'm also wondering about snakes. Why do people run if they saw one right in front of them, why are they afraid of it? For me, it's just a tube of muscle with a head. :)) But again, with all of nature's madness there is a wonderful functionality for it. :]


My next random train of thought? EVOLUTION. haha! [kiddin']

"Of Politics and OFF Politics"

As I watched my aunt while making her speech last Sunday afternoon, it made me wonder. Is her job being a politician makes her a professional? Why and why not? As I heard her saying out loud the lines that expresses her love for her country, one of those line says:" Para sa ikabubuti ng bayan, magkaisa tayong lahat! ang inyong lingkod..". I reflected to myself that night. I grew up in a family where love and familiy unites, where political issues are being dined in on the table together with our meal every dinner, where everyone is asked about their own opinions about the present government and when we learned to talk to people whose names we didn't know or even if we did, we can't remember anymore. Ever since I entered school, my teacher would always ask during the first day of the school year:"Are you related to ex-mayor/vice mayor/chairman blah blah blah...?" and I would often say: "Yes.". Another follow-up question of :"Is he your grandfather/uncle/aunt?", I'll quickly answered yes again and then turn my back or do something else to escape the small talk. It's not that the topic is pointless, but for me it doesn't seem to play a big part in the everyday life as it could. It's not that I was ashamed of my relatives, it's just that I don't like the idea ME being known by people because of them. I wanted to be recognized by others because they believe in me, by being me and simply being ME. Going back to my reflections, I asked myself, all those times being exposed to big crowds and gathering why I hadn't learned to love nor dream being one of the leaders of my country? Maybe because I can't imagine myself in a municipal hall /capitol nor standing in front of a big crowd asking them to vote me. Honestly, I don't have any grudges nor hatred on politics but I'd probably see myself years from now in the hospital, caring for my patients and building a rapport with them, standing in front of a big crowd and conducting health teachings, attending numerous medical missions or talking professionally to doctors or other members of the health care team. As I closed my eyes that night even though my first question was unanswered, I thought of one thing. That there are one thousand and one ways to express love for my country. Being one of the leaders is only one of those, there are a thousand left more. Just by paying right taxes on time, helping my other Filipino people IN and OUT of the country, buying Filipino products truly I can make Philippines feel that I love her. As what my aunt had said that Sunday afternoon, I'll end this blog borrowing those lines. Para sa ikakabuti ng bayan, magkaisa po tayo..

Ang inyong lingkod,
GARCIA, AMBER LOUISE S.P.

[unanswered Q.]